The Big Phan Theory
by beavercorn
Summary: Dan and Phil move to Pasadena, California and meet the big bang gang. Wanted to try writing a crossover. Hopefully you'll like this! (Very bad summery. Actual story is better.. I hope)
1. Chapter 1

Dan's POV

"Phil.. How.. How.. many.. more.. stairs?" I choked climbing yet another flight of stairs. The lift had a luminous yellow banner across it that had the label 'Caution' on it so we were left to climb the endless flights of stairs.

"I don't know.. The last apartment said 3B so I'm guessing one more flight." He replied as we struggled with our luggage.

"Why did we have to move to Pasadena anyway?" I complained at him.

"You wanted to move to California.."

"I wanted to move to LA.. No one listens to me though.."

"It's only 2 hours away.."

"Not close enough.."

"Well.. That's not my problem.. It's cheaper here anyway."

"Whatever.." I sighed at him as we reached an apartment and looked at it's number.

"4A.. Not this one.." Phil said.

"Is it the one across the hall?" I asked him. He looked across the hall and noticed that one was 4B.

"Not that one then.." he sighed with defeat.

"Why don't we ask someone?" I suggested.

"Okay.. Good idea." Phil agreed and turned back to apartment 4A. He was about to knock when we heard some voices.

"For the last time, That's my spot." a stern male voice echoed.

"Sheldon.." another mans voice, that sounded slightly more friendly, exclaimed in disbelief.

"No 'Sheldon' about it." he said, mocking the other person's attempt at talking some sense into him "We've been through this many times before Leonard. No one sits in my spot."

"You were in the restroom.. I thought I could."

"Now you're just being silly."

"I'm not moving." the other person said. I admired his sassy tone.

"Fine sit there. See how I care."

"Really?" The other one exclaimed in even more disbelief then before.

"Bazinga.. Now move."

"You're unbelievable." I heard some shuffling and tried to muffle a giggle.

"Come on.. Lets go to 4B instead.. They might be more helpful." Phil said.

"Yeah.." I agreed as we walked across the landing and knocked on the door. A beautiful blond haired girl stood there.

"Hey.. Can I help you?" She seemed polite enough.

"Um.. Hey. We're looking for apartment 4D.." Phil said.

"That's right there.. Next to mine." she said with slight excitement masking her voice. "Can I just ask, where are you guys from?"

"England. Why?" I responded.

"I thought so but didn't want to offend you if you weren't"

"Fair enough. We should probably introduce ourselves. I'm Dan and this is my best friend Phil. I guess that we're going to be neighbours now or something.." I said to her, rather awkwardly.

"Sorry about him.. He's not good at human interaction. He spends literally 7 hours a day on Tumblr so, he doesn't get to see people much." Phil said, trying to convince her that I don't talk to people often.

"What's Tumblr?" _She doesn't know what tumblr is? _I let my internal thoughts slide and continued the conversation.

"Um.. Don't worry." I said, hoping to change the subject as this was starting to get slightly awkward.

"Well my name's Penny and I'm an actress and part time waitress at the cheese cake factory" She added a smile to the end of her sentence.

"Oh cool.. We're both internet video bloggers." Phil said in an attempt to not give away that we work for YouTube.

"And we were radio DJ's up until I swore on the radio.. 4 months of trying so hard and then I had to go and fuck it up by swearing when I fell over my microphone. I don't know how I even manged it though.. I mean, to be fair, there was a very long cable attached" I said as Penny let out a small giggle.

"So now we're here because a company said they wouldn't mind taking us on." Phil added on.

"Okay. Well, I'll catch you later. Oh and beware of the people across the hall. One of them is okay and the other one.. You'll see soon enough."

"Oh.. We already heard them through the door." I said feeling slightly more at ease because I could feel the conversation was drawing to a close.

"Yeah, well.. Bye." Penny said to us, keeping her friendly tone.

"Bye" I said.

"see you later." Phil added. Penny closed the door on us as Phil turned to me.

"She was really pretty!" Phil said to me in a hushed tone so she wouldn't hear.

"You like her?" I asked him.

"Well.."

"I never thought you'd like someone like that.."

"It's just.. She's so nice, and pretty and helped us of all people out."

"Come on.. We should get to the apartment so we can go out and get some dinner before it gets dark."

"It's only 3pm.."

"Really?"

"Yeah.. You must be jet lagged."

"Probably. Anyway, It will be dark by the time we've got the apartment straight and unpacked everything."

"True.."

"Okay. Let's go!" and with that we made our way to our new apartment.

* * *

**Hey! So I wanted to give crossover a shot and ended up crossing The Big Bang Theory and Phan together to make the rather in-genius name of this story. I also wanted to make a funny story because lets face it, my other fictions are pretty upsetting in places. Hopefully you'll like this! Feel free to follow the story if you're enjoying it and favourite it as that would make me very happy. Also, leave a review as that will keep me going on with this, whether it is giving constructive criticism or just a nice message, it's much appreciated! :] **


	2. Chapter 2

Me and Phil were on our way to get dinner after a long afternoon of unpacking. It was now becoming almost impossible for both of us to keep our eyes open any longer so we were planning on going to bed as soon as we finished eating. Then a tall thin man walked out of apartment 4A. He scanned his eyes over at Phil and looked him up and down and then turned back at me and did the same things.

"Hello.." He said to us.

"Hi. My name's Phil and this is my friend Dan" Phil said back to the person across from him.

"Doctor Sheldon Cooper." he then smiled at us and edged his hand out closer to us looking like he was going to let us shake it but his hand was trembling so I don't know if he actually wanted to or not. Is he scared of us?

"Is there a problem?" I asked him, generally very scared.

"Do you know how many germs are on the human hand alone?" He responded to us, in utter disgust.

"Um.. I can't tell if that's a serious question or if you're being rhetorical." I responded to him. Mid sentence he looked back with even more disgust making my sentence drift off.

"How rude.."

"Excuse me?"

"You interrupted me."

"Wha-" He cut me off by his cocky voice.

"There are over 1,500 germs per square centimetre. Judging by your hand size there would be over 20,000 of those little things crawling on your hand."

"In our defence, we never asked you to shake our hand.." Phil said back at him, I bit my lip trying not to laugh. Sheldon just looked across from me and Phil in shook, not sure about what to say next. Then a much smaller man came out of the same apartment and looked up at myself and Phil in awe.

"Hello?" He looked up at us as if he was intimidated by our height.

"Hi.." Phil said, still very awkward.

"I'm Leonard.. I've seen you've met Sheldon."

"Yes.. We have. My name's Dan and this is my friend Phil" I said back to the smaller man, Sheldon was still slightly confused.

"Oh. Anyway, Are you new here?" Sheldon said back to us in a hope to change the topic.

"No.. Been here for years." I said in a very sarcastic tone, slightly disturbed by our new neighbour.

"Really? I've never seen you around here before." Sheldon exclaimed as he stood back in shook and disbelief as Leonard looked proud at us for making his room mate look this stupid.

"Ignore him.. He's being sarcastic." Phil said back to him.

"Ahh.. The art of sarcasm. Where one makes a bitter remark in an attempt to make one other feel stupid. The name was adapted from a Greek word that meant to tear flesh, bite the lip in rage or even sneer, if you will" Sheldon gave us a smug look, as if expecting an applaud while Leonard facepalmed as if he's heard this story many times before. "I've been told I'm amazing at it" Sheldon added on.

"Really?" I exclaimed, not sure what to say by that.

"Yeah. I've been working on it really hard lately." He folded his arms and gave us a strange look, making me feel uneasy.

"Okay?" I said back at him.

"Bazinga.. I was being sarcastic. I told you, I'm amazing at it." He said back to us.

"At least I've found a person who is slightly more socially awkward then myself." I thought aloud.

"Well.. It's been lovely talking with you." He said his face then screwed up and he started to giggle "Sorry, I couldn't keep a straight face with that one. I was being sarcastic again. I'm getting better at this." He said, looking proud of himself as I gritted my teeth.

"I'm so sorry about him.. He's not good with interacting with actual people." Leonard said to us. Neither am I, this time I thought in my head rather then aloud.

"Well.. Bye?" Phil said awkwardly

"Goodbye." Sheldon said as he let out another smirk that looked like a bad attempt at a smile and started to walk down the stairs.

"Bye guys.. I'll see you around some time. Maybe you could come around at some point or something." Leonard said in a quick mumble as he started to follow Sheldon down the stairs.

"Yeah, maybe.. Bye!" I said back to Leonard.

"I don't like Sheldon.. Too smug." I said to Phil once they had gotten enough down the flights of stairs to not hear us.

"I dunno.. I feel like he could be alright once you get to know him. I mean, Leonard puts up with him, what makes us any different."

"Well, Leonard is probably really knowledgable like Sheldon while I was a college drop and he is probably not as easily annoyed as me."

"Everyone deserves a chance. He'll probably be really nice and the more friends we make around here the better. We left so many people behind in England."

"I guess.. I'll give him a chance."

"Good. Anyway, you want to get some dinner now?"

"Sure!"

We then made our way down the stairs and found a shop that sells pizza. After taking it back to our new place we ate and broke our plan of going to sleep straight after because we went on the internet for hours responding to tweets, reblogging pictures and saying how much we missed London instead. A while later the tiredness kicked in and we got the idea to go to bed but ended up not being able to because the delivery van still wasn't here with our furniture so instead we ended up having to make beds on the floor. It was fairly easy to fall asleep until we were woken up by something in the middle of the night.


	3. author note please read!

Hey guys.. So, I am sort of thinking about discontinuing this fiction. I have a few reasons as to why I think this. 1) I am finding it hard to keep up on updating and so most my fictions go days without an update which is frustrating as a writer and probably is just as annoying as a reader. 2) I'm not sure if there is that many people who are in both the tbbt fandom and the phandom. What do you guys think?

Love you guys and please tell me what you think

~Beavercorn


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